Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Memo to Target Cashier Checkout Guy:

Here's what's your business: using your little scanner thing to add up all the prices on the items I purchase and determine the total and then charge me accordingly.

Here's what not your goddamn business: making inane and borderline-derogatory comments about the nature of those items and the quantities in which I am purchasing them. STFU, asshole.

I am well aware that I am purchasing what might appear to be an unusually large number of razors, or deodorant sticks, or tubes of toothpaste, or shower gel. Not that it is any of your motherfucking business whatsoever (see above), but I like to limit the number of trips I make to your store. This is a purposeful strategy designed to limit my total number of interactions with shit-for-brains assholes such as yourself. Fuck off!

11 comments:

Kingfish said...

Werd

Gleemonex said...

The temptation would be to mutter something about using the stuff to make a bomb -- but then you're met outside in the parking lot by Homeland goons, and so the joke's on you. In Gitmo.

But anyway ... yes. Yes to this whole post.

Anonymous said...

I don't know if I am just getting old and cranky but, based on some recent exchanges that I have had with various customer service representatives (Home Depot, Citicorp) I would have had no problem saying something along the lines of "I'm sorry, I just don't understand the part of this process where you need to be concerned with what it is that I am buying" in a very condecending and derogatory manner.

Cam

Anonymous said...

I got a verbal beat down from a taxi driver the other day. I was at the hotel reserving transportation to the airport for the next day. He insisted on seeing my itinerary then looked at my connecting flight from the second leg of my trip and tried to argue that I didn't need a taxi at all. Dogtrack

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