Thursday, April 23, 2009

before anyone is alarmed

... thinking that, you know, I've gone insane, let me clarify:

1. I didn't intentionally set out to obtain a pet mouse; and
2. That's the first and (likely) last haiku of my blogging career.

______________
Update: for further clarity:

The original plan for the mouse was that it would be a fun, temporary playtoy for the other pet (a cat). The cat, after all, likes to play around with little fake mice, and it gets more interested in them if you kind of dangle them, or throw them, or move them around. So I figured an actual mouse, which moved on its own, would get even more interest. I pictured the cat batting the mouse around a bit, chasing and stalking it, etc. Maybe giving it a friendly bite on the neck or so.

But let me back up a bit. A mouse costs $3.00 at the pet store. I am reliably informed that people often purchase them for use as meals for pet snakes. So purchasing one for use as a cat toy didn't seem to me to be a breach of any kind of pet store etiquette.

But, uh, on the contrary... at the pet store when I told the lady I wanted to buy a mouse, she gave me a long look and asked: "For a pet?" I hadn't expected this, but I think I recovered well. I said yes. Or maybe I didn't recover all that well, because then she asked me if I had a cage, and mouse food, and etc. "Oh, yeah, of course. Got a cage. Uh huh. Lots of mouse food, at my house. Yep."

The pet lady's suspicions were again aroused when my companion and I also purchased a large container of kitty litter. "The mouse isn't going to, er, be a "playmate" for the cat. Is it?" "Ohhh, no. No. Of course not! Noooo. Nope."

I had been asked (not by the pet lady) what I planned to do with the mouse once the cat, inevitably, got bored with it. (The assumption, rather optimistically, being that the mouse would still be, like, alive at that point.) I said I planned to set it free. You know, return it to nature. These answers were met with some skepticism. Nevertheless, the plan went forward.

When we got home with the mouse: disappointment. The cat was interested for about 90 seconds, at which point -- upon perceiving, I believe, that this cat toy was, in fact, an actual live animal -- the cat retreated into a corner of the room and managed to simultaneously look bored and horribly frightened. Subsequent attempts to engage cat with mouse failed miserably. You can see the results of one such effort below.

So. In conclusion, I have now been prevailed upon to keep this mouse as a "pet". His home is now a clear plastic storage box with no lid. We dumped junk mail from the paper shredder into the bottom of the box. The mouse made a little nest. He eats stale Ritz crackers. He has now, a week later, managed to acquire an exercise wheel. I can't tell whether he is happy (nor, frankly, do I particularly care), but I suspect it is better than an alternate destiny as snake food.

5 comments:

Gleemonex said...

If anyone ever asks me to describe you to them, I am going to send them this post. It is you, in a nutshell.

PS: I'm glad the mousie avoided a tragic fate. Heh.

oakleyses said...

longchamp outlet, christian louboutin, nike air max, cheap oakley sunglasses, nike air max, christian louboutin uk, chanel handbags, replica watches, louis vuitton, ugg boots, nike roshe, louis vuitton outlet, longchamp outlet, nike free run, ray ban sunglasses, prada outlet, louboutin pas cher, sac longchamp pas cher, uggs on sale, louis vuitton outlet, longchamp pas cher, jordan pas cher, ugg boots, nike free, michael kors pas cher, oakley sunglasses, gucci handbags, prada handbags, polo outlet, burberry pas cher, kate spade outlet, louis vuitton outlet, oakley sunglasses, christian louboutin outlet, polo ralph lauren, oakley sunglasses, ray ban sunglasses, replica watches, oakley sunglasses wholesale, jordan shoes, nike outlet, ray ban sunglasses, tiffany and co, polo ralph lauren outlet online, tory burch outlet, longchamp outlet, tiffany jewelry, christian louboutin shoes, air max

oakleyses said...

north face uk, coach purses, kate spade, true religion outlet, michael kors, michael kors outlet online, coach outlet store online, ralph lauren uk, burberry outlet, nike roshe run uk, hogan outlet, new balance, sac vanessa bruno, guess pas cher, true religion outlet, nike air force, oakley pas cher, ray ban pas cher, michael kors outlet, nike air max, michael kors outlet online, hollister pas cher, lululemon canada, michael kors outlet, nike air max uk, sac hermes, abercrombie and fitch uk, nike free uk, michael kors outlet, ray ban uk, uggs outlet, north face, mulberry uk, polo lacoste, uggs outlet, burberry handbags, coach outlet, michael kors outlet online, vans pas cher, hollister uk, timberland pas cher, true religion outlet, nike tn, michael kors outlet online, converse pas cher, true religion jeans, nike blazer pas cher, replica handbags, nike air max uk

oakleyses said...

valentino shoes, celine handbags, ghd hair, herve leger, beats by dre, new balance shoes, nike huaraches, north face outlet, soccer shoes, reebok outlet, hollister, north face outlet, instyler, nike air max, baseball bats, ralph lauren, converse outlet, lululemon, insanity workout, hermes belt, nike air max, babyliss, longchamp uk, gucci, ferragamo shoes, hollister, mont blanc pens, soccer jerseys, lancel, p90x workout, chi flat iron, timberland boots, nfl jerseys, hollister clothing, abercrombie and fitch, bottega veneta, wedding dresses, nike trainers uk, oakley, ray ban, iphone cases, mcm handbags, giuseppe zanotti outlet, louboutin, jimmy choo outlet, nike roshe run, asics running shoes, vans, vans outlet, mac cosmetics

oakleyses said...

louis vuitton, canada goose outlet, pandora jewelry, moncler, louis vuitton, karen millen uk, pandora jewelry, replica watches, marc jacobs, doudoune moncler, swarovski crystal, canada goose, canada goose, moncler uk, links of london, wedding dresses, ugg, canada goose uk, louis vuitton, canada goose, moncler, juicy couture outlet, moncler, ugg,ugg australia,ugg italia, louis vuitton, coach outlet, hollister, moncler, thomas sabo, canada goose outlet, canada goose outlet, pandora charms, louis vuitton, canada goose jackets, juicy couture outlet, toms shoes, pandora uk, moncler outlet, ugg uk, swarovski, montre pas cher, ugg pas cher, ugg,uggs,uggs canada, supra shoes, moncler outlet